New Year's Resolutions

It's that time of year again - the time when most of us make a commitment to do things better (or different) in the coming year. This year, I'm writing my list on paper and putting it on the wall next to my desk as a constant reminder. I hope that, by doing so, I'll do a better job of creating the habits required to actually keep my resolutions.

Here's my list of resolutions for this year:

1. To eat healthier.
2. To exercise more.
3. To practice more, both on bass and baritone guitar.
4. To begin reording for a new CD.
5. To complete my book proposal and get it to an agent.
6. To continute to focus on reducing my debt load.
7. To be better organized.

This year, I plan to drink fewer sodas and more water. I plan to eat more salads. I intend to exercise every day, rotating between two or three different types of exercise.

This past year, I haven't spent as much time on my instruments as I'd like, and intend to change that. I've also worked toward recording a new CD for the past two years, and intend to complete the project this year.

When I began this blog a few months ago, I wrote that I had returned to a book idea, and I intend to work on that and send the proposal to an agent before the end of the year.

While my move to my new hometown slowed my debt reduction plan, it didn't kill it completely, and I will continue to focus on that this year.

I've always been what a close friend calls "organizationally challenged". It's something I have to really concentrate on to avoid being ineffective. Over the past several months I've made good strides in this area, and will continue to focus on doing better at this.

There's one other resolution, but it's rather personal. I'm only mentioning it to keep it as part of the list, albeit a hidden part.

I look forward to a happy, healthy and productive 2006. I hope the same is true for you.

Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah

For those celebrating today, I'd like to extend my best wishes for a wonderful - and meaningful - day. In between the opening of presents and the feast, I hope you'll take the time to think about the true meaning of the day.

I also hope you'll take the time to say a prayer for those less fortunate. There are many who will not eat today, who will not open a present, who live in shelters or cardboard boxes down by the river. Remember them, for they are your brothers and sisters.

"I assure you, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters, you were doing it to me!"

Peace on earth...good will toward all...

My Letter to Santa

Dear Santa,

I did the best I could. Obviously, I haven't been perfect; if I were, I wouldn't need to be here. But I have done my level best to be as good as possible. I hope you'll agree that I've been good enough. . . good enough to deserve a present or two. So, here's my list for this year:

Give every man woman and child a home and enough to eat.

That's really all I want, because I have everything else I need - a nice home, a great job, people to love who care for me in return. And, as far as stuff goes, I've got more than enough.

I'll leave the cookies and thermos of coffee in the usual place. And some carrots for the reindeer.

The Journeys of Socrates

Dan Millman is one of my favorite Personal Growth authors. I've been reading his books for more than a decade, and think I've read just about everything except his children's books. His latest is The Journeys of Socrates, which is a prequel of sorts to his best-selling (and perhaps best-known) Way of the Peaceful Warrior and Sacred Journey of the Peaceful Warrior.

All three of the above titles are fictionalized accounts of Dan's life and that of his most important Mentor. Unlike many of his other books, which are "guidebooks" to living a more spiritual, more fulfilling life, these are written in story form. Dan's a fine writer, and tells an excellent tale. In addition to being entertaining reads, each of them contains some excellent wisdom.

If you haven't read the Peaceful Warrior series, I recommend you start at the beginning with Way of the Peaceful Warrior, continue with Sacred Journey, and leave the book on Socrates for dessert. I highly recommend all three. In fact, I recommend you read everything the man has written. Regardless of your faith, you'll find tons of helpful advice on living a good life.

Reading Dan's Peaceful Warrior books is what gave me courage to write about my own life. As I've said before, it's not like I'm some shining example of saintly living. I've made share of mistakes, and then some. I do hope, however, that I've learned from them and used those lessons to do better moving forward. I also hope that, by being open about my own experiences, I can help others avoid some of things I've done or, perhaps, to see their own choices in a new way that will help them rise above them in a more positive way.

By the way, Dan was also an Associate Editor on Chicken Soup to Inspire the Body and Soul®, which includes my essay, A Gift of Spirit. This is the story of how an accident, which almost took my left eye, helped me better understand the spiritual essence of playing music. For information on how to order a signed copy, visit my main web site.

An Excellent Holiday Gift

Here's a gift you can give that really does keep on giving. And it's a gift that can change lives.

I just read an article about Kiva, a non-profit organization that connects givers to needy businesses in Africa. Through this organization, you can make a micro-loan - as little as $25 - to an entrepreneur in Uganda, Kenya or Tanzania. Once the loan is paid back, you can turn around and loan it to another business. This means your initial gift can help someone again and again.

The UN has been trying to promote microcredit for some time, going so far as to name 2005 the International Year of Microcredit. Unfortunately, however, most companies involved want to make a profit. And microcredit so far has been an unprofitable business, at least in Africa. Enter Kiva.

Kiva is a non-profit organization that is funded by a group of well-to-do philanthropists in the San Francisco Bay Area and neighboring Silicon Valley. Because of this, Kiva is able to let every dollar loaned through them pass directly through to the entrepreneurs. Now, how cool is that?

I hope you'll take a moment to take a look at Kiva's website. Even more, I hope you'll contribute to their efforts. What a wonderful way to celebrate the holidays.

Holidays: It's More Than Just Christmas

OK, here we are, smack dab in the middle of the holiday season. And, once again, I find myself wondering about those who attempt to force their holiday on others. Yes, Christmas is coming. And for many, it's an extremely important religious holiday, more than just a chance to get presents.

The thing is, there are other major religious celebrations going on during this time as well. And there are those who, for one reason or another, don't celebrate a "holiday" during this part of the year. So why do some feel the need to try to force others into acting as if Christmas is the only holiday and that everyone should be celebrating it?

Now, for many, if not most, it is a celebration of Christmas. But not for all. Some celebrate Hanukkah. Others celebrate Kwanzaa. Still others have already celebrated Ramadan...for an entire month! Let's not forget Solstice. Or those who have no specific winter celebration as part of their spiritual or religious path.

Here in America, we're supposed to have freedom of religion. We are not supposed to be forced into any particular religious mold. And I support this completely. It is not my right or obligation to force others to believe as I do. Neither is it the right of anyone else to tell others how to worship or what to believe. Or celebrate.

Many of our worst wars have been fought in the name of religion when, in fact, virtually every religion has a prohibition against killing. Most religions also preach tolerance of the beliefs of others.

I believe that we all need to be tolerant of other's choices in terms of spirituality and religion, as long as they're not preaching death and destruction to "non-believers". And, as you've probably already figured out (at least, if you've visited my web site), I believe that we can all live in greater harmony if we practice tolerance and respect.

Christmas is a celebration of the birth of Jesus. He was the ultimate pacifist. He taught that we should all show respect and compassion to others. Wouldn't it be wonderful if all who claim to follow him were to at least attempt to follow his teachings?

If you celebrate Christmas, I hope it is a joyful - and meaningful - day for you. But I sure won't force you to celebrate it if it isn't part of your spirituality.

Happy Holidays!

The Holiday Spirit

The holiday season is now upon us once again. For most Americans, this means celebrating Christmas, even if they aren't Christian. And along with that comes holiday shopping. This is where the "rubber meets the road", so to speak.

Every year at this time, I marvel at people's attitudes. Short tempers, rude behavior, belligerent exchanges, fights over parking spaces and more. It never ceases to amaze me that so many celebrate the birth of one who sacrificed his life to preach love and compassion by acting in complete opposition to those ideals.

This year, I'd like to ask you to really think about that. Keep the purpose underpinning all that shopping in mind as you navigate the malls. Remember what it's all supposed to be about.

When others are in a rush, all aggravated, remember to offer a smile backed by understanding instead of rising up to match their frustration.

When it's your turn to be checked out, remember that the poor soul behind the counter is a person, too, and treat them the way you'd want to be treated if you were the one having to deal with eleventy-twelve rude shoppers an hour. Smile at them and say, "it's ok. Take a deep breath. Then, take all the time you need. I'm not going anywhere."

When someone verbally lashes out at you, try responding with compassion. Say to them, "I'm sorry you're having such a tough holiday season. I hope it gets better for you."

In other words, really get into the holiday spirit. Then spread some of that spirit to those who so clearly demonstrate that they need it.

I think that, if you try it, you'll find yourself in a different world entirely.

Happy Thanksgiving

I would like to take a minute to offer my best wishes to all for a wonderful - and meaningful - Thanksgiving.

By "wonderful", I mean that I hope you have a great day, filled with good food, good friends and family.

By "meaningful", I mean that I hope you take the time to actually consider your life and be thankful for the good things about it.

Do you have a roof over your head? Be thankful.

Do you have food to eat, clothes to wear? Be thankful.

Do you have a job? Be thankful.

Someone once said that "[h]appiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have." So take a moment today to appreciate the good things in your life. And be thankful.

Change

The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become.
Charles Du Bos

Once we've learned a certain way of behaving, we have a hard time changing. Oh, we don't mind changing external things: jobs, locations, clothes. But we have a hard time effecting change within ourselves. We don't like admitting that we could do something different, something better, than what we are doing now.

I am just as guilty as anyone of having difficulty making changes in myself. There are times when it flat-out unnerves me to consider changing. There are times when a friend points out something about me that could be better, and it hurts my pride. But part of being a better person each day is to recognize the things about ourselves that could use some improvement, and then working on changing what is wrong, what could be better.

When I'm objective about it, I can see there are things I could do better, ways that I can improve myself and be a better person. It has taken me a long time to learn that I don't have to beat myself up - that, instead, I can acknowledge my fault and commit to doing something positive about it. And I'm still working on this one.

I know that I can be a better person, a better version of me. Changing for the better isn't about "pretending" to be something you aren't. It's about working to be something better than you currently are. And I know that when my friends find the courage to point out something about me that could use improvement, they are doing so because they care.

Today, with this post, I am acknowledging that there are things about myself that I want to make better. I am saying Thank You to those who've had the courage to tell me things that may not be easy to say.

Small Things, Great Love

Mother Teresa said, "We can do no great things; only small things with great love." How true that only a very, very few of us will achieve truly great things. But we can certainly change our little corner of the world for the better. And that can be a great thing!

Each small act of kindness, each little display of compassion, each quiet smile, helping hand or kind word. . . these are the things that make our world a better place. This is how you do small things with great love.

Just think how much better our world would be if each of us chose to do small things with great love. Every one of us. Every day. Every chance we get.

Note: My sincere thanks to theladybug for reminding me of Mother Teresa's words. And for sharing with me a unique and wonderful outlook on this subject.

Still Catching Up

I just wanted to take a minute to let everyone know I'm still alive. Things have been a bit crazy lately but are finally settling down somewhat. I've now got new transportation...after my old van breaking down yet again. It's nice to have dependable and decent looking transportation. Nothing fancy, but it fits my needs and that's all I wanted. I don't really go in for "showy" vehicles much.

Anyway, I hope to get back to regular posts this weekend. Look for something new and worthwhile no later than Sunday. And thanks for sticking with me.

Time Flies When You're Sick

It's been almost two weeks since my last entry here. I've been fighting a cold for much of that. I don't get them often, but when I do, they hit me hard.

I've heard from both Anthony and Dale since their return to the New Orleans area. While the damage to their homes is severe, they are both staying and beginning the process of clean-up. Both are in very good spirits.

Not a lot else to say at the moment. Still getting back on my feet. But I'll be back in a day or two.

Until then, live well.

Musicians Helping Musicians

Relocation and dealing with tragedy are never easy. For working musicians, it can take months to develop a productive network and find work. Thankfully, New Orleans musicians have a lot of friends in Houston willing to help.

If you know a musician displaced by Katrina, have them contact NOAH - New Orleans and Houston. They have set up a website to help coordinate their efforts.

NOAH is operating under the umbrella of the Musician's Benevolent Society, a non-profit group based in Texas. Their staff of volunteers is working to help provide housing, relocation assistance, loaner instruments and gear, and help finding work. If you can offer support - money, time, gear, whatever - please contact them immediately.

Stranded's Last Stand...For Now

Tonight is Stranded's last gig before Dale and Anthony head back down to New Orleans to assess damage to their homes - and their lives. I finally had a chance to download a few pictures taken Wednesday night at The Shovelhead Saloon. Below is a shot of (left to right) Tony, myself, and Dale.


Thanks again to all who have come to the gigs and shown their support. Also, many thanks to Charlotte's for having us out yesterday afternoon for a lunchtime gig. The owners have already asked the band to play every Friday night through the winter if Dale and Anthony come back to Danville. Although it's too early to tell what will happen, it sure is heartwarming to know we have a permanent gig if they come back.

Stranded Enters the Final Stretch

Well, here we go. We're headed into the weekend and have performances scheduled for tonight (at the Shovelhead Saloon) and tomorrow night (at Pla-Mor Lanes in Hoopeston).

Community support remains very strong, and the band has generated local media interest. Wednesday night, Dale and Anthony were featured in a spot on the ABC Channel 15 Evening News (Champaign affiliate). Thursday, both the Danville Commercial News and the Champaign-Urbana News-Gazette ran stories featuring the band.

The News-Gazette story appeared on page 3 and included a picture of the band performing at the Shovelhead Saloon. The Commercial News story was a front-page (above the fold) feature on Katrina survivors in Danville. This story began with Stranded, and included two pictures from the same gig - one of the band and another of Dale. You can read the story here.

A huge THANK YOU to all who have come out to our shows and shown support for Dale and Anthony. They both appreciate it very much, as do I. A special thank you to Mary Wicoff of the Danville Commercial News for getting us into the paper - not once, but twice! - and for giving us the most prized placement possible for Thursday's article. Thanks to the News Brief in Wednesday's paper, more people came to that night's show. If we're lucky, the Thursday article will help generate even more interest for this weekend.

More on Katrina

Well, it's been a busy few days since my last entry. Dale and Anthony have found several more gigs in the area and we've been working hard to get some attention from local media to help the cause.

The band now has a name: Stranded. We all thought it was appropriate. Sunday, the band played at The Shovelhead Saloon, and we're appearing there again tonight, and Friday night. Monday we got to do a one-hour set between two other bands at Julee's Shooting Star in Westville.

We've got one final gig before Dale and Anthony attempt to go back home for more salvaging. Saturday, we'll be at the Pla-Mor Lanes bowling alley in Hoopeston (about 40 minutes north of Danville). In all, we've managed to find six gigs in nine days. That's pretty incredible, and it goes a long way toward helping Dale and Anthony get their lives back together.

Early next week, my two new friends will attempt to go home to better assess the damage and to see if they can salvage more personal and professional belongings. Dale has a pest control business; Anthony is a landscaper. Although still unsure, they may come back to Danville until they can return home for good. There's just no way of knowing until they can see with their own eyes what the storm has done.

So far, the response has been terrific. Not only have the owners of these venues been willing to shoehorn the band into their schedules on short notice, the audience support has been fantastic. We'd all like to thank the entire Danville community for their support. It's been very heartwarming to Dale and Anthony, I can tell you. In particular, we'd like to thank:

• Wheeler's Uptown Tap
• The Shovelhead Saloon
• Julee's Shooting Star
• Pla-Mor Lanes
• The Danville Commercial News
• Champaign-Urbana News-Gazette
• ABC Channel 15, Champaign
  
• C&D BBQ

Please keep Dale and Anthony in your prayers for the next few days, ok? In some ways, the worst is yet to come . . . when they return home to assess the damage.

Overcoming Tragedy

Last night, I did a pickup gig with two Katrina refugees. Dale (guitar) and Anthony (drums) left New Orleans on Sunday, stuffing everything they could into a pickup truck and heading north. Anthony's lady lives in my town and they came here to wait out the storm. When they realized they wouldn't be able to go back for some time, and had lost most of their gigs, they began to scrabble for work.

I got a call from them Thursday night. I almost didn't do the gig, because it was a short notice thing, and only paid tips. (It's been a long time since I worked for tips alone.) But when Dale mentioned New Orleans and what had happened to the two of them, I decided to do it just to help them out. And I'm so glad I did.

What impressed me most was the fact that, instead of sitting around bemoaning their fate, they were doing their best to rise above the tragedy and move on with their lives. Anthony had to spend his last money to buy another drum set (his current set wouldn't fit in the truck if they were to bring anything else). No complaints...just the comment that he was grateful to be able to play and make some money. They both have many family members and friends they haven't been able to contact since the hurricane. Again, no complaints...just prayers for the missing.

I was also very glad to see the outpouring of support from the audience. Virtually everyone in the club put money in the tip bucket. At the end of the night there were several fives, tens, even twenties. I also saw many people drop wads of singles. The bar owners, who were under NO obligation to pay anything, contributed $100. I spoke with several patrons throughout the night who were as impressed as I was with Dale and Anthony for digging in their heels and refusing to give up. And I think the attitude these two displayed had a lot to do with the size and amount of the tips received.

More than anything, last night was an object lesson in overcoming tragedy. It reminded me of things my father taught me over the years. Sitting around and crying about the challenges in one's life does no good. Of course, watching your home be covered by flood waters, knowing your life has literally sunk into the ocean, is going to hurt. It's extremely difficult to deal with, to say the least. But giving up isn't dealing with it. Getting back on your feet and moving forward is. Putting aside your troubles and doing what you can - and doing it to the best of your ability - is dealing with life's tragedies. And that's what Dale and Anthony did last night.

To quote my own poem, which I wrote to honor my father and his lessons:

He said, Life is like that son, you go with the flow
You do what you do, you know what you know
Life is today, just here and now
Life is like that sometimes, life is like that somehow

So, the next time life hands you a challenge, I hope you'll remember this little story about Dale and Anthony. I know I will. I can't tell you how happy I am to have met them.

Charity Auction for Katrina Victims

The American Red Cross has partnered with Charity Folks and Morgan Freeman to help raise funds for victims of Hurricane Katrina. The Oscar-winning actor, who's home in the Mississippi Delta escaped the brunt of the hurricance has worked tirelessly with other entertainment celebrities to bring the auction online as quickly as possible. A sneak peak at the Charity Folks web site includes the following prizes:

• Attend the premiere of Morgan Freeman’s upcoming movie An Unfinished Life, which co-stars Robert Redford and Jennifer Lopez.

• VIP tickets to Fashion Rocks which will feature performances from David Bowie, Destiny’s Child, Duran Duran, Alicia Keys, Tim McGraw, Billy Idol, Gwen Stefani, Joss Stone and Rob Thomas, just to name a few.

• Two cross-continental first class tickets on Virgin Airlines.

• An exclusive getaway at the fabulous Four Seasons Hotel in New York.

• Tickets to be in the studio audience at That 70's Show and a script signed by the cast.

• Four luxurious nights in a Prince Suite at the Princeville Resort in Kauai.

• VIP tickets to the Jimmy Kimmel Show with passes to the "Green Room" and a picture with Jimmy.

• An afternoon on the set of "Drake and Josh" (Nickelodeon)

Bidding opens at Noon (Eastern Time) today. Visit Charity Folks to take part in the auction.

Katrina Aid

Unless you've been hiding in a cave, you've heard about the devastation caused by Hurricane Katrina. If you haven't made a donation, I hope you will do so soon. The American Red Cross is now accepting donations. You can donate directly from their web site, or call 800-HELP-NOW.

As for safely making a donation, here are a few tips from Charity Navigator:

1. Deal with an established organization.

2. Designate your gift to ensure your money goes where you want it to.

3. Beware of telemarketers.

Read the entire article here.

The cost to rebuild is estimated in the tens of billions. But right now, what the millions of people displaced by this catastrophe need are food, water, shelter and emergency medical care. Our donations will help give these things to them.

I hope you will join me in offering help.

What About the Old Journal?

Today, I've updated the Life with Spirit website to reflect the beginning of this blog. While doing so, I realized that the old journal entries will no longer be available online. Many of these entries aren't useful anymore, but some may still have value for others. So, over the next few days, I'll be going through the old entries and reposting them here.

Back to the Book

Yesterday afternoon, I began working again on a book idea I've had since my father died. I hope to complete this project early next year and will post occasional updates here as the project progresses.

Of all the people I've ever known, my father lived the life closest to my own ideal. After his passing, I began to collect stories from friends and relatives, and to make notes on the things he taught me about life. Many of the things I write about are a result of Dad's influence; his way of seeing and interacting with the world taught me the value of living with compassion and conviction. This book is my way of honoring my father, and his teachings.

Welcome!

Welcome to my new journal. After a year of hosting my journal on my own web site, I decided to switch to the blogosphere in the hopes that, over time, more people would find it.

Because my schedule is extremely busy of late, I'm not sure how often I'll post, but will do my best to offer something new at least once a week. If I have time, I will certainly post more often.

So....again, welcome. And thanks for visiting.